Diary Of A Slightly Nervous Mom Trapped At Home With A Toddler During Covid-19 Self-Quarantine In Bangkok

My son’s school is closed. My husband is working from home. I went from having the freedom to go about my daily routines (and the house to myself for a few hours a day!) to not having it at all. The only one not really affected is my dog Milo — though he might be wondering why everyone is at home all day? 

We’re in a strange, unprecedented situation where the whole world is asked (some may argue forced) to stay at home and indoors. From looking on social media and talking to friends on video calls the world and our lives in it are in a weird place. Each and everyone of us is adapting in different ways — some better than others and that’s okay. 

I will fully admit I was terrified and stressed at the idea of my son’s school closing for an extended period of time; I just didn’t know what I was going to do all day with an almost-three year old who is so used to being occupied in school with his teachers and friends. As an adult if someone asks me to stay home, I can find ways to self-entertain and keep busy but if nothing works: then Netflix / staring and scrolling through my phone it is. I can’t apply the same strategy with my kid. He needs different kinds of engagement and stimulation in blocks of 20-30 minutes for multiple hours a day! Suffice to say — my respect for teachers is at an all-time high right now. 

Playing the teacher’s role at home for the last two weeks has been interesting. Firstly, whatever free time I had in the mornings is now “classroom” time with online learning and an assortment of activities from his school, Google searches and other mums. Secondly, being the type-A project-driven person I am, I plan different activities and toys to play with and (naively!) assume my son will enjoy all the new activities I have for him. But right now we’re at a 30-50% success rate: for every 3 new activities I show him, he may like 1 and that too for maybe 15-20 minutes. Thirdly, looking at these numbers from the perspective of having to fill up 4 hours of time in the morning and then another 3-4 hours in the afternoon is kind of…depressing and demotivating. 

Initially, I got frustrated if my son didn’t focus or wanted to play or do something else that wasn’t “planned for” — I have a schedule and I want to stick to it. But children don’t think like that. What I have learned from the last two weeks of being at home with my son is that children actually need very little to be engaged and happy at home. Turns out all he needs is the company of someone (parent, grandparent, nanny etc) to play and do things with and talk and listen to. It doesn’t even really matter to him what we’re doing. But yes, spending endless hours free playing with and chasing a toddler is no easy task.

So here’s a few ways I discovered that help “structure” our days together, channel my son’s never-ending bouncy energy and, most importantly, keep my sanity: 

---

Set up a little table and chair or a dedicated area to do activities together every day: We sit together and do activities such as worksheets and arts and crafts. What I do is show my son photos of different activities and crafts and ask him if he wants to do any of them together. If he says yes, then we work on something together. A few examples include: finger painting, simple arts & crafts, tracing activities. Read my post here for more ideas. 

Rotating toys: I cleaned out and reorganised my son’s toys (a great time to do some spring cleaning anyways!) by categories i.e. cars, blocks, pretend play, books etc. And then I will offer him a different category of toys every few days. By rotating the toys around it helps keep the excitement for him to play going. I also only bring out a few toys at a time so that he’s not overwhelmed. 

Baking / cooking together: There are loads of super easy child-friendly recipes available online and baking/cooking together is a fun 20-30 minute activity to do. We’ve tried making banana peanut butter cookies and fruit and yogurt popsicle  — both of which were a big hit and lots of fun! Recipes below: 

• Banana peanut butter cookies: 1 banana, 1 tablespoons peanut butter, 1 teaspoon vanilla essence, 1/2 cup of flour. Mix all the ingredients together, make small dough balls and bake in the oven for 15-20 mins at 180 celsius.
• Fruit and yogurt popsicles for serving of 6: 1 banana, 6-8 frozen strawberries (or any other fruits you prefer), 1/2 cup of yogurt, 1/2 cup milk, 1-2 tablespoons of honey. Blend together for a smoothie-like consistency, pour into a popsicle tray and freeze overnight. 

Eating meals together as a family: Now that everyone is home I plan as many meals together as possible (sometimes my son will eat earlier) and this has been a good way to while away a good 30 minutes chatting and eating. 

Extra screen time: I am not ashamed to admit that I have given into extra screen time to get a break when I need it. 

Video calls with family and friends: I think my son is a still a little too young to understand and focus on video calls but nonetheless it’s a really nice way to stay connected with family and friends in a time when we can’t physically see each other . 

Ask open-ended questions and have conversations: Since I am spending so much more with my son I notice I communicate with him in a different way: instead of saying “it’s time for this or that”, I will ask questions like “what do you want to eat / do etc?”, “where did you go?”, “how do you feel about … etc?” And so we’re now having longer conversations and it’s fun to see how grown up (and sassy!) my little one really is! 

Extra long baths with a little activity twist: We’ll do some painting or cooking where my son’s hands and feet get messy and then I explain that it’s time for a bath to wash himself properly and any toys that got messy too. So he gets busy washing himself and toys. Add some bubbles into the bath and that’s the next 20-30 minutes taken care of. 

Teach a skill: Quarantined at home with my kid and no place to go? I’m using the extended period of time to potty train my son. It is a long and painstaking process but it’s something that we’re doing together, kills a lot of time and (hopefully) reaps long-term benefits. Similarly, this extended time can be used to teach riding a bike, a new language, a new skill or even a sport. 

---

My list is not a fool-proof list by any means. Being stuck at home with an energetic toddler is not easy. He is feeling cooped up at home and it gets to him too. We have good days and bad days. So keeping that in mind, I am trying my best to be positive and upbeat but if we both need to let off some steam and throw a tantrum, so be it 😉

I don’t know when the Covid-19 situation will improve and I am mentally prepared for quarantine and social distancing to be our new normal for a few more months. And if the last two weeks have taught me anything, it is to be grateful for two very basic things I think a lot of us take for granted in life: family and health. 

I am treating this time with my son and family being home together safe and sound as a gift; having this perspective grounds me in moments of frustration, stress and fear. 

I hope you and your family are healthy and safe. Please remember that staying home, practicing social distancing and washing / sanitizing as frequently as possible is the only way to help overcome this situation — do not take it lightly and do not take your family and health for granted.